inspiration from my angel

Once again, Leeann has proven to be my angel. We are planning on starting Water aerobics again at the gym. It was her idea and I love the thought of it. We used to do it together all the time and we both really toned up and felt better. My clothes definately fit better when I was doing that class. I figure that combined with Leslie Sansone, I just have to lose weight. These are desperate times. I have made 3 very specific goals for this year and they all involve being in good shape. I want to climb Mt. LeConte again, with Rick. I want to do the Race for the Cure in October. and I want to fit into my cocktail dress from our last cruise by December. I can zip it but the rolls are pretty noticeable. I want them to be much smoother without the aid of Spanx. I think consistency with the working out will be helpful. I always do better with that when I have a partner. Leeann will be my partner, my angel who will kick me in the pants if I start to slack. With all the new data about women dying of heart attacks or stroke, that is all the more reason for me to get healthy. I want to live a very long time.

I just talked to my dad tonight. He is excited that I am going to go down there to spend a few days with him while my mom is gone. Its going to be a little weird for me not having my mom there but I think it will be good for us and Dad won't be so lonely with me there. At least the weather should be warm. I'll get to spend some time with my 5 nephews as well. That's always interesting.

Chanel wants to go to grad school right after graduation. The GMAT is going to cost $250. Can you believe that? The costs of everything academic are overinflated.

More later. Have a good Wednesday. Hump day!

I'm on a 30 day diet and all I've lost is 15 days

This week I have been so frustrated with the whole weight loss thing. I can't seem to get it together. I thought that working out 4-5 days per week would work but here I am third week in Feb., going in to my last week of our 8 week fitness challenge and I am only down 2 pounds. GAH! I've expressed my frustration to various people and I hear things like "you're building muscle and muscle weighs more" "The important thing is that you are getting healthier" " The numbers don't matter." Well, I am here to tell you that yes! yes, the numbers do matter! They matter alot. I am telling myself not to stress about the weight, it is bound to come off. I mean, who works out all the time and doesn't lose weight, right? The answer to that question, obviously is: Me. Now, that said, I had to laugh when I was going through my old Weight Watcher booklet and lo and behold, I am actually 10 pounds less now than I was 1 year ago. Hmmmmm, now that's encouraging.

Being a mom

Yesterday Leeann and I took Katie to go and see Charlotte's web. Its pretty bad that movies based on children's books make you cry. Did I ever tell you that I'm a very emotional girl? I was telling Leeann that I miss having little girls to go and do things like see kids movies. She was quick to point out that I could go with them whenever I want which is very kind of her to offer. The point is, I miss my girls. I miss playing dress up and Barbies. I miss playing ballet and singing. I miss playing baseball in the front yard. I miss snuggling up with a bowl of popcorn. I miss the princess movies.

Today I was reminded that the kids still need me to be their mom. Sienna is very sick with Strep throat. She needed me to come up there and sort of take over, like mothers do. Soon as she asked me to come, i was in the car speeding towards her house. We went to the ER and sat and waited. I gave her cough drops, water, and rubbed her back. I even let her use my I pod. I was there with her when she got 2 injections. I was there through the tears. I took her home and made chicken noodle soup and she ate for the first time in 1 1/2 days. I think my just being there reassured her. I was a mom. i want to be able to take care of my girls when they need me. Luckily, they don't need me very often, but I just wish I could do more for them. Its nice to feel needed. Its in my nursing nature to want to help others.

I may have mentioned that I'm not good at being alone. Rick has to work all weekend and I will be by myself. Maybe I'll just sleep in a while, clean house, scrapbook. I'll figure something out. Mostly, I just miss Rick when he's gone and I sit around feeling sorry for myself. I know! I'll go shopping!

Have a good Sunday!

Ain't love grand?

Sienna is in love. I love it when she's in love. She is always in such a good mood when she has a boyfriend. And when Sienna is in a good mood, everyone can breathe a sigh of relief! I know absolutely nothing about this guy except that he makes her happy and for now, that's all that matters. She informed me today via Facebook, (yes, Facebook, don't ask), that she might not have as much time for me now that she is officially dating someone. Not quite sure how I feel about that but its nice to have the heads up. :-)

Chanel is still in love. She is now considering not having a big wedding. She says that its not been fun for her planning for their wedding in October and frankly, its just not her personality to have a traditional wedding. I say, YAY for you Chanel! She always marches to her own drummer and good for her that she plans to contunue to do so. They are talking about getting married under a waterfall near Cookeville where they live. She was kind enough to let me know that if I couldn't make it down to the waterfall, that there was a ledge above the waterfall that I could stand on to watch. Because after all, I am getting kind of old and may not be able to get around the rocks that easily. lol! ahhhh, youth. I say, I may want to just stand on the ledge because I don't want to get soaking wet, not because I couldn't get down there.

My husband is the greatest man in the world. My valentine's gift was perfect. It was a gift card from the scrapbook store, (and lingerie, but I think the lingerie was really his gift, not mine.). The card was great but the best part was not the amount on the card, it was the fact that he actually made the effort to go to the scrapbook store to get the card for me. He tries to avoid that store as much as possible and I think it was probably uncomfortable for him to go in there, but he did it. That was very sweet. I just love him. The other girls at work made me feel proud today. They were complaining that their husbands didn't 'pet' them enough or give them enough affection but they all knew that Rick is very affectionate towards me and they are all jealous! Yay for me!

My dad called me yesterday and left me a message. He said that my nephews who are 8. 6 and 5 made him valentines cards. He seemed very proud of that. It was sweet listening to his message.

I'm off from work tomorrow and plan to spend the afternoon with Leeann and Katie. I am so looking forward to it. I haven't seen Leeann in a couple weeks, I'm sure she looks great. I can't wait to see her. I just love her!!

Have a good night!

Sienna

Sienna came over yesterday and spent the night. Bless her heart, she says she just doesn't like going home by herself. She insisted on getting this apartment alone last summer and I warned her that she might get lonely. Of course, I am just the mom, I don't know anything. I hate the thought of her being there by herself every night. Just from a safety standpoint. I told her I was going to buy her a baseball bat to help keep her safe. I wish I could buy her a puppy to keep her from feeling lonely but they don't allow pets where she lives. I hope that when her lease is up she will rethink this whole idea of living alone. I always hated being alone at night. When Danny and I split, we each had the kids for a week at a time. I used to cry at night when the kids were gone because I didn't know what to do with myself. I had never spent nights and days alone. I went straight from my parents home to being married with children. It was tough just being alone with my own thoughts. I didn't like it at all and I hope that I never have to experience that again.

We went to Barnes&Noble for coffee and then we went to a late movie. I am getting too old for late movies! Thank goodness for White Chocolate Mocha! Sienna let me take some pics of her (big surprise)! She usually won't let me, I have so many pictures of her with her hand in front of her face. Overall, we had a great night. I didn't get to go to Fuji's though. I was pretty bummed about that. I think Rick is getting sick of Fujis, though I can't imagine why. Its like the best food ever!

Sienna took me on a tour of her MySpace. Scary. Its amazing how obsessive people can become with MySpace and Facebook. Its like an alternate reality. I don't really like it and I don't like that she spends most of her free time on it. There's some pretty weird stuff on MySpace. She offered to get my site set up for me. I just said no thanks, I don't have the time for it.

Sienna cracked me up yesterday. When the kids were little, I used to have them suck it their cheeks and make fish faces then I would hold their cheeks like that and make them say Pudgy Pup over and over. Okay, so its a llittle weird but it used to make us laugh. My mom used to do it to me when I was little. Well, the girls have little brothers who are about 3 & 4 and Sienna was doing it to them!! I love it! Carried on down through generations! :-D It doesn't take much to entertain us!

Hope you all are having a good weekend!!

It's 11 p.m. Do you know where your wife is?

I'll tell you where Rick's wife is, as far away from their bedroom as she can get. Gosh! This is the 3rd night in a row that I have had to get up to take a sleeping pill because of his snoring! I hate it when he falls asleep earlier than I do. If I can just get to sleep first, life is in perfect harmony. If not, aaaarrrrgghhh! Sleep is so important to me. If I don't sleep well, there is hell to pay the next day. And that could potentially affect 50 people in a day. Not good. It really is a good idea for me to fall asleep first. I think that since we got this new bed he just gets comfortable so easily and he is out in no time. I'm not real sure when our roles reversed. Used to, he was up til 12 or 1. Now he's usually asleep at least by 10:30. And he snores so loudly!

So now I'm waiting for the Sonata to kick in. hmmm hmmm hmmmmm. Not sleepy.

Been working on trying to get some of Chanel's pictures organized so i can scrap them. I wish i had had the foresight to write down some things. Its hard to remember so far back when all I really have is dates on the pics, if that. After her first few months, she was always a happy baby. But I wish I could remember our feelings and thoughts way back then. I know that she almost always made me happy and proud. Just like she does now.

Okay, I think I will try to sneak, loudly back into the bedroom. If I'm loud enough maybe he will roll over on his side. Ear plugs. I think I will invest in some ear plugs.

Sweet Dreams!

My girls

Today is Super Bowl Sunday. Go Colts!! Peyton Manning deserves that Super Bowl ring more than anyone else in the NFL.

Yesterday I went to Cookeville to visit Chanel. I love love love seeing her. We have such a strong bond and we just love being around each other. We went shopping at Chanel's favorite place, Goodwill. I thought we would never get out of there! 2 hours. That's how long we were there, 2 hours. Ugh. They were having a 1/2 off sale. They have lots of stuff there with the tags on it still. That's why it took so long, we had to go through each individual piece to find the good stuff. Then we went to this great shoe store. Marti & Liz shoes. Wow. That is an awesome shoe store. They have all name brand shoes for discounted prices. We walked out of there with 4 pairs of shoes and I really wanted 2 more pairs but I thought Rick wouldn't quite understand. :-) Shoe shopping is one of my favorite things to do. We spent at least 1 1/2 hours in the shoe store too. And then, it was time for me to go home. I hate leaving her. We are so close and I just love her! Not only do I love her, I really really like her. Chanel is one of those people that everyone likes. She just has a way about her that makes each individual feel like they are very special to her. She's the most social person I know.

Sienna didn't get the assist. manager job. There was another applicant that had management experience. Im a little relieved. I just don't think she needs the added stress right now. She is going to work as a sales associate though and they have guaranteed her plenty of hours and more money than she's ever made so she is thrilled.

I am so lucky to have 2 girls who love me as much as they do. They are good girls. Never any legal stuff or drugs or alcohol. They are both beautiful, bright, down- to- earth girls, though Sienna does get a little dramatic sometimes. I'm grateful to have such close relationships with each of them.

Have a happy Sunday!